Saturday, December 22, 2007 AD

Possibly the worst joke ever...

From Norman's Demesne:

A man is waiting for his wife to give birth. The doctor comes in and informs the dad that his son was born without torso, arms or legs. The son is just a head! But the dad loves his son and raises him as well as he can, with love and compassion.

After 18 years, the son is now old enough for his first drink. Dad takes him to the bar, tearfully tells the son he is proud of him and orders up the biggest, strongest mug of beer for his boy. With all the bar patrons looking on curiously and the bartender shaking his head in disbelief, the boy takes his first sip of alcohol. Swoooosh! Plop!! A torso pops out! The bar is dead silent; then bursts into whoops of joy. The father, shocked, begs his son to drink again. The patrons chant "Take another drink!" The bartender continues to shake his head in dismay. Swoooosh! Plip! Plop!! Two arms pop out. The bar goes wild. The ! father, crying and wailing, begs his son to drink again. The patrons chant, "Take another drink! Take another drink!!" The bartender ignores the whole affair and goes back to polishing glasses, shaking his head, clearly unimpressed by the amazing scenes. By now the boy is getting tipsy, but with his new hands he reaches down, grabs his drink and guzzles the last of it. Plop! Plip!! Two legs pop out. The bar is in chaos. The father falls to his knees and tearfully thanks God.

The boy stands up on his new legs and stumbles to the left then staggers to the right through the front door, into the street, where a truck runs over him and kills him instantly. The bar falls silent. The father moans in grief. The bartender sighs and says, * * * * (Wait for it) * * * * * * (Ya ready?) * * * * (Don't hate me) * * * * ** * * (Take a deep breath) * * * * "He should've quit while he was a head!

{source: A Prairie Home Companion}

Comment: Good thing that Norman has such a credible source as A Prairie Home Companion, otherwise we might have to wonder just how such an esteemed Lutheran man found such a joke! Just kidding, Norman! Be sure to visit Norman and say "Umm, thanks."

Friday, December 21, 2007 AD

My Christmas Goose

My, but it's been a long time since someone made a drinking-related comment in these parts!

Anyhow, a couple years ago, I first discovered the Goose Island Beer Company and waxed poetic about Honker's Ale. I added it (and other G. I. offerings) to the Aardvark's Big Rotation O' Brew and Wine.

Goose Island Christmas AleThis year, a different brew finally made it to my rather primitive parts of planet Lutheran and I'm happy to tell you that I took the liberty of sampling Goose Island Christmas Ale on behalf of all our loyal reader(s?). According to the tag hanging from one of the bottles, "with each year the recipe changes slightly so there is something special to look forward to each season. Traditionally, it is a complex brown ale that develops well in the bottle for up to five years. (Emphasis theirs)"

Not wanting to blindly accept someone else's word about such an important topic, I bit the bullet, bought the six, and pledged myself to unbiased sampling. After tallying the results (and the final empty bottle), I must say that this year's brew lives up to its reputation. The one thing I can't fathom is anyone keeping this delicious ale away from his palate "for up to five years."

My only regret is not having tasted the ales of previous years in order to make a good comparison. DV, that shall not be a problem again.

Technorati Tags: | | | | | | | |